How Do I Actually Follow Jesus?

A great deal has been written about how to decide. Remarkably little about the following morning.

So this page assumes you have got there, or nearly, and it deals with the practical question nobody seems to answer: what actually happens now.

First, what is not required

Clearing this away first, because the misconceptions here cause real distress.

There is no formula. No sentence you must say correctly, no prayer whose wording matters. The claim at the centre of Christianity is that you are made right with God by trusting Christ, not by executing a procedure accurately. If you have been anxiously wondering whether you said it properly, you have imported a concern that does not belong to this.

There is no registry. Nobody signs you up. There is no card and no list.

You do not have to become Western. This is worth saying firmly, because it is a common and painful assumption. Christianity began in the Middle East and was for centuries predominantly Middle Eastern, North African, and Asian. There have been Arabic-speaking Christians since before there was an English language. Your language, your food, your family, your poetry, your name — none of it is at stake.

And you do not have to be certain. The Gospels record a man saying that he believes and asking for help with his unbelief, and the request is granted rather than rebuked. Wanting to trust is a legitimate place to begin.

What the first step actually is

In plain terms: you tell God, in your own words, that you are turning to Christ and trusting him.

That is not a ritual and it does not require an audience. People do it walking, or lying awake, or in a car. Some write it down. What Christians hold is that the address itself is heard — which, if you have come here through a long stretch of prayer that felt unheard, is precisely the thing at issue.

If you want more on what changes about the act of praying itself, see how to pray.

Then: read the accounts yourself

This is the most important practical step, and it is the one most often skipped in favour of finding a community.

Read one of the Gospels straight through. Most people start with Luke, which presents itself as an orderly investigation of sources, or John, which is the most direct about who Jesus claimed to be. Read it as you would read a document, not as a devotional exercise.

Two reasons this matters more than it sounds. First, you will meet him rather than a description of him, and a great many people report that this is the point at which the figure from the dream and the figure in the text turn out to be the same person. Second, it makes you independent. A person who has read the sources cannot be told what they say by someone with an agenda — in either direction.

Getting a copy in your own language, safely, is covered separately.

Then: find one other person, if you can

Christianity is not designed to be practised alone, and isolation is the single most common reason people in this position quietly stop.

But this step carries the most risk, and it should be taken deliberately rather than eagerly. One trustworthy person is worth more than a congregation, and considerably safer. In many settings that person will not be local; online contact with believers from a similar background is how a great many people begin, and it is a legitimate way to do it, not a lesser one.

Before you approach anyone, read the Safe Place Pledge and think properly about exposure. And if you have nobody at all, you can write to us without giving your name.

Baptism, and being careful about it

Baptism is the New Testament's normal public marker of the decision, and it is not treated as optional or merely symbolic. Most Christians will encourage it, and they are not wrong to.

They may not, however, understand your situation. In much of the world, baptism is the specific act that converts a private matter into a public one — frequently the point at which families find out and at which legal consequences attach. That is not a reason to refuse it. It is a reason to time it with someone who understands what it will cost, and to be wary of pressure from anyone who does not.

The longer question of concealment is dealt with on its own page, because it deserves more than a paragraph.

What to expect

Some honesty about the shape of the next year.

Feelings vary enormously and prove nothing. Some describe overwhelming relief. Others describe very little, and then a slow change over months. Neither indicates whether the thing is real.

Doubt will return. That is normal and is not a sign that the decision was false. The page on doubt applies here as much as it did before.

The hard things generally stay hard. Nobody in the documented accounts reports that the difficulties dissolved. What they report is a different footing for facing them.

And the cost, where there is one, tends to arrive later than the decision. Plan for it: what to consider before you tell anyone and how to tell your family.

Common questions

What if I have done things I think are unforgivable?

This is one of the most common fears in this situation and the answer at the centre of Christianity is direct: the offer is not made to people who have earned it. The New Testament's own leading figures include a man who denied Jesus outright and a man who persecuted Christians violently.

Do I have to leave Islam formally?

There is no formal exit process in most contexts, and no requirement that you make a declaration. What is required is a change of trust, not the completion of paperwork.

What if I change my mind?

Then you change your mind. Nobody here is keeping a list, and nothing about this site's purpose is served by someone pretending to a conviction they do not hold.